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Ask Him Too: The Family Health Conversation Many Men Skip

· 2 min read · By MenGO Team

A clay oil lamp burning softly against a dusk sky

Mahalaya is a morning for remembering the people who came before us: parents, grandparents, uncles and elders. Most of us can tell a story about the men in our families, how they worked, what they cared about, what made them laugh. Far fewer of us can say how they looked after their health, because they rarely talked about it.

That silence is worth gently changing.

Why ask

Doctors often ask about family history. Many men cannot answer, because the conversation never happened. A few written notes give you a clearer picture to share, and they give the next generation something that was missing for ours.

How to start the conversation

Men of an older generation may not be used to talking about their health, and that is fine. A few things help:

  • Pick an easy moment: a walk, a drive, a cup of tea.
  • Begin with stories, not questions about illness: "What was it like when you were my age?"
  • Ask one thing at a time, and let silence do some of the work.
  • If he would rather not answer, leave it. You can ask someone else in the family, or come back another time.

What to note down

  • Conditions that he or other relatives lived with, and roughly when they appeared
  • Check-ups and screenings he did, or wished he had done
  • Habits he changed over the years, and what prompted the change
  • Anything he would tell his younger self

Keep it private and safe

Family health information is personal. Keep your notes somewhere private, and share them only with people you trust and with your doctor.

Bring it to your next appointment

Say simply, "This is what I know about my family." Your doctor can tell you what is worth paying attention to. Please do not try to diagnose from the notes.

Start your own record

MenGO is a private, science-based companion for men's personal health, with reliable information and access to qualified specialists. Keeping your own notes in one place is a good way to start, so the next generation has something to ask about.

Men's personal health. Act with confidence.

Subho Mahalaya.

MenGO provides general information and is not a substitute for professional medical advice.

  • mahalaya
  • family health history
  • men's health
  • mengo

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